The festive season is upon us again, and for many, it is not a holly, jolly, holiday and festive time of year. It is a time of year where most people are stretched, cranky, the social diary is overstuffed, and our wellbeing buckets are in desperate need of a replenish. This often creates the perfect conditions for a storm of emotions (and maybe outbursts) from stress, overwhelm, irritation and everything in between!
Here are some merry tips to consider that have been inspired by some Christmas Carols that may help you regulate your wellbeing and emotions during the festive season!
Joy to the World
The festive season provides a wonderful opportunity to practice shifting your mindset to focus on the positives of the season. Yes, there are a lot of plot twists and stressors, but reflecting on what you’re thankful for, what you got right, the wins you had, and your blessings, even that two minutes of peace you found, can help to increase feelings of joy and reduce stress.
Jingle Bells
Jingle all the way and keep it light and playful! Don't take everything too seriously this season and find (or make!) time for laughter! Laughter is an awesome strategy, that when used appropriately can help with stress and tension as it helps to relax the muscles and gives your brain a boost of the good stuff that makes us feel good! Try a new activity, sing along to your favourite carols (or songs if you are feeling grinch-like!), watch a comedy, enjoy having fun with your friends or embrace a little holiday mischief with your elf on the shelf! Laughter and playfulness will lift your festive season spirits!
Be like Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer!
What a lesson in embracing strengths and owning it! It is easy to feel out of sync with others at this time of year! Embrace your inner Rudolf and welcome your unique qualities that will allow you to shine bright in your own way. Play, dance and focus on your own rhythm and what feels right for you, and focus away from the noise around you. Try to not get lost in the comparisons on social media and if you find you are, maybe take a social media pause. Enjoy your own journey, your way, at your own pace!
Do you have some festive season strengths? Are you a gift-wrapping extraordinaire? Do you have the finesse for a stunning fruit platter arrangement? Do you have the merriment to bring people together? Maybe you write the most thoughtful Christmas cards? Playing to strengths fills our energy buckets. How can you play to your strengths this festive season?
Silent Night, Holy Night
For my fellow people who find themselves very overstimulated by this time of year, carve out that very important time and space away from the holiday hustle. As complex humans we need a variety of rest including social, mental, emotional, sensory and physical. This space to disconnect, rest and fill up your buckets plays a fundamental role in managing stress and all the emotions that come with this time of year.
All I Want for Christmas Is You
Foster your meaningful connections with quality time. We know our connections play a big role in our wellbeing. Our special people help us feel loved and seen, they help us laugh, they help us problem solve when the going gets tough. Say a big YES to the plans you genuinely want to be part of, spend time with the people who bring you joy, happiness and a sense of calm. Undoubtably there is pressure to see and spend time with certain people that may create very opposite feelings for you. If this sounds like you, it may be a good time to remind yourself of what your boundaries are – are they time related, topics you do not wish to discuss, what treatment you will not tolerate. Give yourself permission to stay for a reduced period of time or set a time limit and have a Plan B if you find you are overwhelmed and need to leave - an exit strategy if you will!
Who are the people that give you the warm and fuzzies? Reach out to people who make you feel good and make some plans to connect. Connecting with others can boost your mood, alleviate feelings of loneliness and can buffer the impacts of stress.
Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree
It is a time of year where social events, food and beverage may be in abundance and this overindulgence can lead you to feel slow, groggy and lethargic. Find ways of moving that you enjoy whether it is a walk with a friend, trying a new activity, dancing to Christmas tunes while you clean. Movement is a gift you give yourself, and it is a gift that keeps on giving as it allows you mind to catch a breath and rest, it releases lots of good stuff into your brain which helps boost your mood, assist with your energy levels and your ability to regulate your emotions and can also help with getting a restful sleep
It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year
They can be hard to find, unless you are actively looking for them, but there is some wonderful in every day. The whole day may not be wonderful, but that awesome car spot, or morning coffee may be the win for the day. Enjoy being in the present, savour the little things and look for glimmers and small moments of joy. Mindfulness is another way you can practice being in the moment – but remember, it is a skill that needs to be practiced!
The First Noel
Is it time for some new holiday traditions that prioritize self-care and joy? Whether it's a quiet morning ritual or a family or solo "unplugged" day, starting new traditions that focus on relaxation, connection, or reflection can bring a fresh sense of peace and purpose to the season. While traditions provide a sense of stability, it may not be the year you follow certain traditions due to loss, anniversary or estrangement, or if there has been a recent death, divorce or family breakdown. Give yourself permission to honour your needs. This may be an alternative tradition or a tradition pause. Draw on your self-compassion and kindness and direct it inward!
Frosty the Snowman
With all the festive season demands, it’s easy to feel like you're melting under pressure. Listen to that body data – it is there to help you so that you can draw on your personal wisdom and support yourself. Emotions across the spectrum are part of the human experience. It is normal to dread some parts of the festive season; not all parts are merry, some parts may be governed by obligation, and other parts may be triggers for painful emotions.
Practice deep breathing or grounding, draw on your boundaries, carve the necessary space for a time out, and slow down!! These tiny acts of kindness to yourself help to fill your wellbeing bucket so you can navigate the season as regulated as possible.
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Go!
Part Christmas Carol part Frozen but the message still works. What do you need to let go of this season:
Let go of what doesn’t serve you: What does serve you? What brings you joy? Maybe that is a starting point! If you can, let go of (some) commitments, invitations, or tasks that suck the life out of you
Let go of perfectionism and self-expectation: Even the best laid plans can demand a pivot. It can be quite automatic to get lost (and stressed) in the details and the self-imposed rules of what we believe we “should” or “must” be doing, the often self-imposed pressure to get things perfect (and perfect all the time….oomph, how exhausting, and we are already tired!!)
Let go of the idea that you have enough time: Let’s face it, we kid ourselves sometimes with our estimates of how long things take, time is a limited resource and there is only so much you can realistic squeeze when you are already tired and stressed!! If you are tired, stressed and snapping at everyone this is your sign to slow down, say no, and complete a task and energy audit. If it takes more energy than you have, give careful consideration to how you proceed!! Your empty bucket may make it a challenge for you to regulate your emotions, draw on your healthy strategies, and exercise your boundaries. Say yes to the things that excite, nourish and give you energy!
Christmas is about slowing down, connection and joy, not perfection and not the endless task list (Yes, I am reminding myself of that too! Let it go, let it go, let it go!!)
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
“Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” speaks to the longing for joy, but also acknowledges that the festive season can be emotionally complex. If you're feeling down or struggling with difficult emotions, make space for them, and if needed reach out and seek support.
If you are struggling with your emotions, consider reaching out to a mental health professional or a dedicated helpline such as:
Lifeline: 13 11 14
MensLine: 1300 78 99 78
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
